Chapter 373
Chapter 373
41 – Elara
I sit frozen, unable to utter a word. I had hoped that by pretending to eat, he would leave me be, but my hand remains suspended mid-air, sandwich halfway to my mouth. How could I possibly measure up to that? His ideal woman is someone he’s known all his life—a former human who now carries the strength of a wolf and holds the title of Luna over the largest pack I’ve ever heard of. And, as if that weren’t enough, she radiates kindness and goodness so brightly it’s like she’s a fairy godmother walking among us. Fantastic. No pressure at all.
Taking a slow, steadying breath, I lower the rest of my sandwich back onto the plate, pushing it aside. There’s no point in battling a past I never lived through. Since my father’s death and the capture of Jeff, I’ve been simmering with anger just beneath the surface, day after day. Maybe that’s where my story should begin then, once I’ve shared everything, we can go check on our prisoners. Perhaps Ben will be so focused on my tale that he’ll forget he wanted me to rest.
The rogue and Jeff look far from their best, but our healers have taken a particular interest in keeping them alive just enough to endure more torture-after discovering their role in my parents’ deaths. It’s strange how even the kindest souls in our pack can harbor a dark side. I’ve learned firsthand that crossing any of them would be a grave mistake.
“Your turn,” Ben says with a chuckle, pulling me out of my spiraling thoughts. Why does his voice send shivers down my spine? I adjust the pillow beneath my head, settling onto my side as I get comfortable. We’d agreed that he’d tell me about Kennedy, the blonde, if I promised to lie down and rest. “And don’t move from there,” he adds firmly.
Though talking about Jeff and the rogues stirs my agitation, I stay put and recount everything I can remember from the past week. So much has happened. Ben pauses now and then, asking questions that I hadn’t thought to ask myself— clarifying details I’d overlooked in my fog of emotions.
“This is exactly why we need him,” my wolf growls softly, her voice growing bolder with each word. Thıs content belongs to
“Enough.” I cut her off. “I’m giving this a chance, but we have to stay focused. The pack is under threat, and he’s here with us. He could still be miles away, with his Alpha, while we suffer here p>
“You are the Alpha now,” my wolf replies sharply. “The elders—or rather, the ‘elder with the stick up his ass’—are struggling with the idea of a female leading. But so far, they’ve been surprisingly helpful and loyal p>
“I know,” I admit. “But I feel like I need to deal with this rogue problem before we
even touch on the matebond stuff. I can’t explain it, but I have to do this as myself— as the female Alpha. Hell, as THE Alpha. If I bring him closer now, I’m afraid everyone will start deferring to him and try to edge me out p>
“You know he won’t let that happen p>
“Maybe p>
“Do you realize you make a funny face when you’re arguing with your wolf p>
I bolt upright on the bed. “What p>
He grins and points to his own face, scrunching his eyebrows and puckering his lips exaggeratedly.
“I don’t make that face!” I protest, tossing my pillow at him and laughing.
“You should do it more often,” he says, not even looking at me as he carefully places the pillow beside him.
I freeze, my voice barely a whisper. “What p>
“Smile.” His gaze holds mine for a moment, the air thick with something unspoken between us. Then, just as quickly, he breaks the moment-grabbing my pillow, tucking it under his head, stretching out on my couch, and closing his eyes. “Now sleep. It’s late p>
I lie there on my side, watching his steady breathing. I have to admit, my nerves don’t feel as frayed with him here. It’s like a fog has lifted from my mind. I’ve been replaying everything in my head all week, trying to piece it together, but nothing clicked. Now, after just a couple of hours with him nearby, my brain finally decides to cooperate. I’m unsure how I feel about it—that uncertainty is unfamiliar to me. I’ve always been so certain, so confident in my decisions. Then he appears, and my body realizes something vital was missing. Now that I know what it feels like to be whole, I can’t imagine going back.
I’ll just lie here, running through my mental lists, letting him drift into a deep sleep before I head to my office to work. It feels good to rest like this, but maybe that’s just because he’s close. Ugh, this matebond nonsense is making me feel like a teenager with a crush-distracted and completely unhelpful.